Do you ever manipulate the people you love? It's almost so subtle that you believe it's out of love. But you'll say and do things to try to get them to change a behavior or make a different choice.
I recently heard someone talk about trustful detachment. This is an orientation toward the other. When someone shares the greeting, "Namaste," they are saying "I greet the sacred in you." When you hear "Wkanje," it's like saying, "you who are sacred standing in front of me." Shalom. Imago Dei.
Over time, if you train your eyes and soul to see the sacred in people, that's what you'll see. It changes how you see and treat others.
Our families and friends are not objects for us to manipulate for our purposes. We can love them and let them be who they are. God is working in their life. You don't have to be God.
Releasing the outcome of someone else's life doesn't mean that you don't care. But caring and controlling can quickly look very similar.
Let those you love be who they are. Love them and let go of the outcome.